Androids of Eden: A Galactic Empire Space Opera Adventure (Quantum Flux Book 4) Read online

  Quantum Flux

  Androids of Eden

  A Galactic Empire Space Opera Adventure

  by

  Sean Kildare

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Chapter Forty

  Chapter Forty-One

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Chapter Forty-Four

  Chapter Forty-Five

  Chapter Forty-Six

  Chapter Forty-Seven

  Chapter Forty-Eight

  Chapter Forty-Nine

  Chapter Fifty

  Chapter Fifty-One

  Chapter Fifty-Two

  Chapter Fifty-Three

  Chapter Fifty-Four

  Chapter Fifty-Five

  Chapter Fifty-Six

  Chapter Fifty-Seven

  Chapter Fifty-Eight

  Chapter Fifty-Nine

  The Quantum Flux Adventure Series

  Quantum Flux – Androids of Eden | A Galactic Space Opera Adventure | by | Sean Kildare | Copyright 2019 ©War Pig Media, LLC

  Chapter One

  The Ship With No Name rocked violently. Red lights flashed and klaxons sounded. The AIs had instituted evasive maneuvers but nothing had shaken whatever was attacking the ship. Another boom reverberated through the ship as it lurched sickeningly starboard.

  Brick was sitting in the head when all this went down. He was reading a book called “100 Ways To Snap A Neck.”

  When the ship jolted a third time he threw down his book and grabbed a roll of toilet paper.

  “Can’t even drop a deuce in peace!”

  Following behind the Ship With No Name were three beat-up looking spaceships that seemed to be repurposed space tugs. High-powered lasers were strapped to the front and rear of the ships. Everything about them looked like it was held together with spit and chewing gum.

  On the side of the ships, crude looking skulls had been hand-painted. They demonstrated little artistic talent but the point was clear. They were pirates.

  Brick stormed into the bridge in a foul mood. Sirm sat slumped in her chair, but the rest of the bridge was deserted. Sirm, as was so often true, was panicked.

  She turned to Brick. “They hit our engine, the one that was damaged on Dickwag. I had to eject it to save the ship.”

  Brick threw himself into the captain’s chair. “Meku. Victorina. Show me what the hell is going on out there.”

  “We’re getting our asses handed to us, that’s what’s going on, honey,” Victorina replied.

  “Well, I wanna see it for myself.”

  “Fine,” she replied and a rear view of the ship came up on the viewscreen.

  Brick squinted at the images. “Are you kidding me? You let us get shot by those pieces of shit? I could beat them in a spacesuit with a laser pistol.”

  “But, Brick-san,” Meku pleaded, “One of our engines was not operating at full capacity and our mobility was reduced.”

  Brick grabbed the stick on the panel in front of him.

  “Mobility was reduced—you sound like the grandma I never had. Give me the goddamn controls.”

  “Navigation is transferred,” Meku informed him. “You now have control of the ship.”

  Another laser blast hit the ship somewhere, shaking it badly.

  “We just suffered thirty percent damage to the life support system.”

  “Shut up, Meku,” Brick ordered. “Buckle-up, Sirm.”

  Sirm grabbed for her safety harness but she was too slow. Brick cranked the navigation stick hard, sending the ship into a roll. Sirm screamed as her body was tossed around the bridge.

  “Evacuate the air from the areas of the ship where there're fires,” he commanded. “And inject some human waste into the engine exhaust. I want them to see smoke.”

  “Done,” Victorina announced. “Your shit is burning.”

  “Won’t be just my shit that’s burning in about thirty-five seconds. We’re gonna fly right up these pirates’ asses,” Brick told her. “Vic, cut the engines, then inject some fuel and spark it. Give them a little fireball so they think we suffered an engine explosion.”

  “Cutting engines in 3...2...1...”

  The low rumble of the engines disappeared. A few seconds later, there was the boom of the unburned exhaust being lit.

  Brick pushed the stick forward, throwing the ship into a slow tumble.

  “Cut to minimal life support power but prime the fusion engine and slowly power up the laser banks. Do it slowly, so they don’t detect it. I’m guessing the sensors on those hunks of junk aren’t much use.”

  “As you command,” Meku announced.

  “They’re breaking from formation to surround the ship,” Victorina announced.

  Brick shook his head. “Of course they are. Thousand years and pirates still use the same tactics.”

  “The pirate ships are now each five kilometers out and holding steady. They are hailing us. Should we respond?” Victorina asked.

  “Sure, why not? First thing though, I want you to angle the engines as far to port as possible and prepare to fire on my command. Meku, I want you to tell me when the laser cannons are beyond safe levels, like deep in the red. When I give the signal, give me as wide a beam as you can while still preserving lethality.”

  “Affirmative,” Meku replied.

  Sirm crawled back to her own chair. Her eyes were rolling back in her head. “Can we hold off on any further maneuvers for a few minutes?”

  “Ten seconds till lasers reach critical, fifteen until they explode,” Meku informed him.

  “Good,” Brick answered. “Bring up the visuals from the pirate.”

  The screen switched from an external view to the captain of one of the pirate ships. He was a human, perhaps fifty years old. He looked like he’d just climbed out of a dumpster after a night of doing tequila poppers.

  “The quality of pirates has really gone down in the last thousand years,” Brick muttered.

  “Prepare to be boarded, you dumb motherfuckers,” the pirate announced.

  “Five seconds to critical,” Meku announced.

  Brick lifted his fist beside his face, back of his hand towards the viewscreen. Then a look of surprise came upon his face, his eyes wide as he raised his right hand in the air and swirled
it as though he were cranking a window open.

  The pirate captain looked puzzled.

  “Two seconds to critical.”

  Slowly, Brick’s middle finger raised up.

  “Multiple explosions imminent,” Meku said.

  “Fire!”

  The fusion engine burst to life. Meku fired the lasers. The ship became a spinning ball of death, spraying lethal laser fire in every direction like a samurai gone berserk.

  The pirate ships exploded almost simultaneously.

  Before the pirate captain’s broadcast disappeared from the view screen, flames were visible behind him and he was screaming.

  The transmission ended.

  Brick sat back in his chair.

  “All enemy ships have been destroyed. Nice job, sexy,” Victorina announced.

  “Don’t suck up, Vic. Give me a damage report.”

  “The laser cannons shorted out pretty badly. We can fix them but we need some parts.”

  “We are down one chemical rocket,” Meku reminded him. “There is minor structural damage and most secondary damage from fire and electrical sources can be repaired by the bots.”

  Brick got up and headed for the door. “Goodie for us. Remind me to have Deena program you two with a better repertoire of tactical options.”

  “But Brick, we have a wide range of options already. Those ships were so old, our sensors didn’t pick up any of the typical signals from their systems,” Victorina complained.

  Brick stopped. “What about life support?”

  Sirm, who was still swaying with nausea after her roll around the bridge, checked on the monitors at her station. “Based on their debris field, it seems they used a living closed cycle system to maintain oxygen levels and provide food to their crew.”

  “Plants? They grew plants on their ship for life support? They really do have a poor quality of pirate in these parts nowadays.”

  “It is very strange,” Sirm commented. “According to a quick data search, that method has not been used in almost two thousand years.”

  Brick turned back to the door. “Just our luck to run into the most backassward pirates in this corner of the galaxy.” He shrugged. “But, we’ll be doing that too if we don’t get to Eden 99 and get some serious repairs. Wake up the rest of the crew.”

  Chapter Two

  Brick sat in the galley, sipping coffee and reading his book on neck snapping. He turned the book sideways to better see a diagram. At the sink, Deena was barfing up everything in her system and moaning loudly. Nearby on the floor, Butch bounced around in an extended, violent seizure. Brick had his foot on Butch’s chest to stop him from bouncing too far away and had stuck a towel in his mouth to keep him from shattering his teeth.

  Syko was in the corner, undulating slowly in what appeared to be his own version of having a seizure. Or perhaps he was meditating. Brick could never tell with the Red Idion.

  Deena, finally and truly empty, dragged herself over to the table and slouched in her seat. “Tell me again, what’s wrong with the AIs?”

  “They fucked up,” Brick answered without taking his eyes away from the diagram.

  “Can you be a little more specific?”

  Brick sighed. “Sure. A trio of space pirates tailed us for about a million klicks and somehow both Meku and Vic missed it. Then their tactical flight patterns were juvenile at best. Now we’ve got damage and the repairs are going to cost us more than we have in the kitty. I’m starting to see how all the other captains let the ship fall into disrepair.”

  Victorina manifested in hologram form on the table between Brick and Deena. Her hands were on her virtual hips and there was a cigarette dangling from her mouth.

  “That’s an unfair characterization. But so typical of a jarhead.”

  Brick pointed a finger at Victorina. “I’m not a goddamn jarhead. I’m a special ops assassination engineer.”

  “Jarhead.”

  “Enough,” Deena interrupted. “Vic, from your perspective, tell me what happened.”

  “We were caught off guard because our sensors don’t detect technology that primitive. We can only work with what we’ve got.”

  “Why would anyone fly around in a ship with two thousand year old tech?” Deena wondered.

  “They had no money,” Brick offered. “That’s why they were pirates. Otherwise they would have gone into investment banking.”

  “It seems odd,” Deena replied.

  “Just fix the damn AIs, would you? So it doesn’t happen again.”

  “I’ll see what I can do. We’ll need to put sensors on our shopping list.”

  From the floor, Butch let out a loud, extended fart and stopped shaking uncontrollably.

  The smell hit Deena and she rushed back to the sink.

  Brick waved his hand in front of his face. “Vic, you gotta fine tune those cryo units to reduce the hangovers.”

  “Promise me that when we buy new sensors, they won’t include odor detectors,” she asked, then disappeared.

  Sirm came over the speaker system. “We are approaching Eden 99 and beginning to get visuals.”

  Brick stood up. “Let’s go people.”

  Deena moaned.

  Butch sat up and rubbed his head. “Thanks for the foot, Brick.”

  Brick gave him a nod. “Go wash your ass.”

  Butch took a couple of sniffs, then nodded in agreement.

  Syko stood and made his way towards the door, still undulating. It looked like he was doing the moon walk, but moving forward.

  On the bridge, Sirm had exterior visuals up on the view screen as Brick entered. She was cycling through various views and magnifications outside the ship.

  Brick sat down in his chair. “What’s up, Sirm?”

  “Something strange.”

  The rest of the crew entered and took their assigned places.

  “I don’t see anything,” Brick commented. “What am I missing?”

  “Exactly. This system is – was – a busy market for food products. An average of thirty billion people moved goods and services through this system when we were last here.”

  “That was a thousand years ago. Literally,” Butch noted. “A lot can change.”

  On the view screen there was no visible traffic in the system as they approached Eden 99, though the planet was still too small to make out many details. Occasionally a piece of space junk, destroyed ship, or satellite would pass by the Ship With No Name. Otherwise, the area seemed deserted.

  “Have we tried to call space traffic control on the planet?” Brick asked.

  “There’s silence on that frequency,” Sirm replied.

  “Try other frequencies,” Deena suggested.

  “I have, of course. There are three that are in use. One is a looped recording of someone selling hemorrhoid relief products—”

  “That’s an important public service, worthy of repetition,” opined Syko.

  “—the second plays music and has annoying people who yell a lot between songs. The third seems to be an official government channel. We sent requests on that frequency but have had no response.”

  “Well, the fact that there’s pirates skulking about tells me that Eden 99 isn’t totally abandoned,” Brick told them. “No people, no hunting.”

  Deena sighed. “Oh, my beautiful home. What’s happened to you?”

  She saw something in the corner of the view screen, to the side of the planet. It was large, but its features were unclear. “That’s Wow-o-Rama! I recognize the big bulbous tower in the middle. I used to go there as a kid. The tower would squirt you out the top and into a tube that spiraled down to a pool!”

  Butch looked from the bulbous tower back to Deena. “Kinda like you were being ejaculated into a sock?”

  Deena cringed. “Thanks for ruining my childhood memory.” Then she turned to Brick. “Can we swing by it and see how it’s changed?”

  Brick shrugged. “Little trip down memory lane? Don’t see why not? You rich I-Farm kids led a whole
different life than we did on the Black Ops Farm.”

  As they got closer, the former amusement park looked more and more like a Frankenstein’s monster. At some point, the park had been expanded willy-nilly. New sections and new rides had been added, but it was obvious no planning had gone into it. There were mad, spiraling roller coasters that were only possible in a gravity-free environment. Nearby there were vomit inducing rides built around the idea of spinning children as fast as possible without causing the centripetal force to pull their eyes out.

  A creepy haunted house with a giant, grinning clown head loomed over one section. Rows and rows of food kiosks and games of luck and skill took up a third of the original park. Those rides appeared to be in serious disrepair, with sections hanging off or fully collapsed.

  “Huh, that seems odd,” Brick said. “Looks like they converted at least part of it into some kind of battle station.” He pointed to an area with enormous turrets and energy cannons bristling from every angle outwards. That part was as deserted as the rest, half-destroyed and its breathable air gone through a gaping hole in the bubble that once covered it.

  Many parts of Wow-o-Rama were nothing more than blackened ruins, as if struck by a major attack. It looked like a giant dead whale that had ingested too much plastic from a polluted ocean, its last act being to vomit up the mess on the shoreline.

  Deena turned away. The long jumps through space in cryo sleep were an abstraction when everyone with you did the same. This was concrete evidence that her old life and her childhood home were well and truly gone. And if the rest of the planet were like Wow-o-Rama, it was gone there too. She got up and rushed towards the door, saying “Excuse me,” as she nearly collided with Syko.

  Brick sighed. “Hold steady here till I return.”

  He followed Deena off the bridge.

  “I fear that she’s making Brick soft,” Sirm complained.

  “Emotionally complex and empathetic,” Syko countered.

  “She’s fucking hot,” Butch offered. “I wish I could comfort her.”

  Chapter Three

  Veckins sat at his enormous glass desk and pounded a bureaucratic stamp onto page after page. He drew a sheet from an enormous pile on his left, stamped them, then stacked them on an enormous pile to his right. Every so often a peon in a tight blue suit would approach the desk and remove part of the pile. Another peon brought more papers and put them on top of the pile on Veckins left.